Sure, that’s the first metaphor I’d think of to describe an organism whose babies devour each other IN THE FUCKING WOMB.
Due to overfishing and, um, intra-uterine cannibalism, these cuddly-wuddlies are seriously endangered. “Intelligent Design”, my pasty white ASS.

The media already love to throat Craig Newmark’s bone, and the scheme to beam jillions of craigslist ads into deep space - assumedly executed yesterday upon Discovery’s launch - was his bukkakiest press stunt yet.
But with all due respect to its newly galactic reach, craigslist really rules because it’s local. How else are you […]

Two weeks ago Hiroshi Ishiguro of Osaka University showed off his ultra-realistic robot girlfriend, whose silicon flesh feels almost like the real thing. And while Sailor Moon-sapien has an uncanny ability to mimic human behavior, right down to nervous fidgeting and fluttering eyelids, there’s still no word on whether or not reported malfunctions (described by […]

You may have heard about the recently discovered “Halle Berry neurons”, so called because they appear to act as single-cell storehouses for specific memories–e.g., the image of a catsuited Halle Berry.
All was copacetic: The team had a major neuro discovery in hand. Nature accepted their publication. They even had a hott media hook for […]

And by boy, I mean massive toxic hellhole. And by dog, I mean dog. The coolest fucking dog anyone’s ever seen or heard of, to be exact.
In a place so horribly ruined by mining that the groundwater can dissolve metal and kill on contact (most notably several hundred migrating snow geese in 1995), […]

Sure, astronauts are already well on their way to having tasty, lab-grown fish chunks to dine on, but what about all the regular folks that have a hankerin’ for futuristic meats? The University of Maryland’s Jason Matheny is on your side! He and his colleagues have conducted a study on ways to produce cultured meat […]

So in case you missed it last week, The New York Times Op-Ed page ran a lengthy anti-evolution rant from a high-ranking Vatican official.
Aside from the sheer WTF-ness of seeing a religious tract in the “paper of record”–here’s your chance, Tom! Fax in an “op-ed” about how Xenu hates Zoloft!–there are several reasons why […]

Looks like psychotropics are good for something other than punching through the fabric of reality and shaking hands with self-transforming machine elves, after all: apparently Nobel-prize winning supergenius Francis Crick was high on LSD when he discovered the most important molecule, ever. This makes him only the second molecular biologist whose earth-shattering discoveries were achieved […]

Julia Cwiebel thinks science is “neat”, and her university paid her four G’s to give lab research a whirl. But as she tells the NYTimes, her internship still lacked a certain…je ne sais quoi:
Though the work was worthy, Ms. Cwiebel said she found it boring. “You’re just in a lab, with no windows and […]